Flash Back

I came across an old blog today that I would like to share.

DATED: NOVEMBER 8, 2006

Ever feel like you have to move on and get away? Lately I have. I'm going to apologize to my friends that I have neglected recently. 'It's not you, it's me...'

It's been really hard trying to make my life decisions, sometimes you have to move on. It's been easier to push people away to try to focus on what's really important, such as life.
I feel like I've been missing out on something more important than just me. I could be doing more. Even being in a job for the last 11 months has been crazy. I get blinded by monotany and routine and every so often it'll drive me crazy. Through the months I have learned to supress it and mask it with, activities every night of the week: MNF parties, Karaoke Tuesdays, Bowling Thursdays, Party Friday, Party Saturday, Football Sunday, and it starts all over again. And oh how much fun we all had!!

It's difficult to fit something important in there. Trying to volunteer, work out...does anyone else feel that they get bored of the routine of life? Does anyone else feel that something more should be happening than just working, having money, partying, and drinking? I feel like I'm just wasting away waiting for something to happen. Waiting for my life to begin, but life is happening all around and I'm not taking advantage of it. I think about all I want to accomplish; getting back into my faith, trying to find my way, trying to help others instead of myself, and trying to be a better person.

I realize some people might not understand my thinking, but if we all thought the same way, we would have such a boring world. I have learned a lot from everyone, and love everyone for it. I knew where I stood in HS. I knew where I stood in college. I see where I stand at work. Now I have to find where I stand in this big world of ours. It might just be time to see what else this world has to offer me....


Wow! It's pretty amazing to read this and to actually know how far I have come. Four months after I wrote this I went back to church and began my search again for what is right. Knowing where I'm at now and knowing where I was at when I wrote that I can honestly say that I've come SO far. Can even go as far as Fiji! Never in a million years would I believe someone if they told me that I would be going on a missions trip to Fiji to share the gospel with hundreds of people! 2007 into 08 has really been absolutely ridiculous! God has really showed me grace and for that I am thankful! I am thankful that He never gave up on me and that He's loved me through my journey. He is such an amazing and loving God and for that I am truley greatful!

Abide in me, and I in you; therefore walk with me. Moses 6:34

The second half of 2008 into 2009 should be a true sacriment to Christ as I step in faith and follow the path to which I feel He's guiding me. Even then I felt the pull to help others, and that is exactly what I will be doing. Leading others to Christ. What better help than that? Life is too precious to waste. For the first time in three years I will be on my own, but not alone, as I will be abiding and walking with Christ. I will never be alone.

God is love.

A New Beginning..

I haven't updated lately. My apologies...

A lot has been happening; First thing is a job. I came back from Fiji trying to figure out my next step. Where to work? Do I go back to be a Missionary in Corporate America or do I make a step in a different direction? In the beginning of the trip we took a class to figure out what our strengths are. What are you gifted at? Naturally sports, by default God gave me the gift of athleticism. What's something you can do for hours and be happy with it? UH...play sports.

Well, apparently this wasn't the right answer. They're looking for something more corporate structured. I like competition, organizing, communication... I kept seeing sports and naturally athletically gifted. I'm sorry if that's not what you're looking for, but that's what I keep seeing.

I didn't think anything of it then, but coming home and by the end of the trip, God filling my heart with the love for kids I've decided that I needed to work with people, coach kids, and get involved with youth. I have excepted a position with Xsport in Libertyville where I will be working at the Front Desk. In the meantime I will also be working on getting a certification in Personal Training so I can work with people and invest in people, but this decision hasn't been easy.

Last week my previous employer called offering me a position, which could be temporary, to help them the next six months until they can find someone to fill the position. It was tempting. I could still work those six months to save money, pay down more debting, work on my personal training certification, and gain more experience in corporate America. I seriously considered it. But I got to a point where I needed to step out in faith. I could very well get stuck there again. Happy with the money I was making. Stuck again. Not persuing what God called me to do. Stuck in routine and monotany and happy with it.

I realize that I need to step out in faith and know that God will take care of me. I will be taking a huge pay cut by changing careers but if Fiji taught me one thing, it was how much a dollar is worth in Heaven. Souls are worth SO much more.

Last Tuesday I called my previous employer and gladly declined and am now stepping out of the boat, in Faith and I could't be happier!

Another update to come soon! Hope all is well. Much love. CAT